League of Large Breasted Women File Class Action Lawsuit Against the Estate of Sir Isaac Newton, Fla

Late Tuesday evening, within the sacred walls of Westminster Abbey, the League of Large Breasted Women (LLBW) lead by New York socialite, Mrs. Karen Walker, officially declared their filing of a class action lawsuit against the estate of Sir Isaac Newton whilst vigorously jumping up and down on the late physicists final resting place and screaming in agony, "This Really Fucking Hurts!"

Sir Isaac (Ouch! This really fucking hurts!) Newton, has widely been recognized as one of the most influential scientists of all time ... most notably known for his "theory" of gravitation and admiration of falling apples and peaches of all sorts, for which the LLBW has based their lawsuit.

"Someone needs to be held responsible for our sagging tits (and asses) ... who better than the creator of gravity! I mean, what the hell was he thinking?" Tuppence Merrimont was quoted saying. "Do you know how long its been since I've been on a trampoline?!? I really miss bouncing."

Mrs. Walker, world renowned fist shaker, lead the voluptuous array of décolletages into a furious and rather titillating display of buxomness ... which was subsequently followed by a frenzied display of pocket-pool by the onlookers.

Nearby, at the legendary One Eyed Pony tavern, a counter protest was being held by the Flat Earth Society (FES). Preparations were being made by the society's UK Chairman, Rupert Flatbottom Nutters (aka Moby), to host their guest of honor, PM candidate and Flat Earth enthusiast, the most honorable Boris Johnson. The event was cancelled upon the news that Mr. Johnson was in fact, chairing the pocket-pool frenzy at the LLBW's event.

With sullen hearts, the mutterings of "There is no gravity .... there is no gravity..." were heard around the globe as the flat earther's sulked away.

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